RELATIONSHIP MYTH
Most of the time, people always have some false hope and assumptions about relationships, that the assumptions makes us feel sad, lonely and disconnected from our loved ones
The dangerous relationship myth are so widely spread. It is no wonder that many of us suffered from the sting of heart
RELATIONSHIP MYTH 1. GIVING = GETTING (GG)
This myth tells us in order to get more attention and romance from your partner, you have to become more affectionate and romantic.So you buy special gifts, cook special meals and tell your partner that you love him/her very much.
Therefore you become more of a giver and you believe that in time that your partner will reciprocate. While this is so true in most relationships GIVE = TAKE. It is true in most occasion not all times. People tend to fall in love when they feel appreciated, happy and nurtured. One falls in love with the other when the other take care of one self and share your emotion with your partner.
NEVER GIVE MORE THAN OFFERED TO YOU.
HINT: Do not keep telling someone that you you love him/her when he/she has not tell you yet
RELATIONSHIP MYTH 2. EXCLUSIVITY LEADS TO COMMITMENT AND MARRIAGE
This is the most dangerous myth of all; often most people come to believe from the time of the dating takes places it will eventually lead to marriage. You should believe this. Let things flow naturally, it is fact in most occasion that dating leads to commitment but the shocking truth is that in most relationships one shouldn't put up all hopes; time will tell if the person is right for you.
RELATIONSHIP MYTH 3. SHOWING A PERSON YOUR FEELING?
In most cases people are afraid to show up their feelings. The fear that you will your partner if you do is always greater. Stuffing your feelings down eventually creates more distance between your partner, the key is not to suppress them but to express them so as your partner can accept you for who u are than the fake you.
The dangerous relationship myth are so widely spread. It is no wonder that many of us suffered from the sting of heart
RELATIONSHIP MYTH 1. GIVING = GETTING (GG)
Therefore you become more of a giver and you believe that in time that your partner will reciprocate. While this is so true in most relationships GIVE = TAKE. It is true in most occasion not all times. People tend to fall in love when they feel appreciated, happy and nurtured. One falls in love with the other when the other take care of one self and share your emotion with your partner.
NEVER GIVE MORE THAN OFFERED TO YOU.
HINT: Do not keep telling someone that you you love him/her when he/she has not tell you yet
RELATIONSHIP MYTH 2. EXCLUSIVITY LEADS TO COMMITMENT AND MARRIAGE
RELATIONSHIP MYTH 3. SHOWING A PERSON YOUR FEELING?
IT'S OK TO SAY NO.
Don’t feel awkward about saying no to sex (or kissing, touching or any other sexual activity). 'No' is an important word in sex and relationships.
Nobody has the right to make you go further than you want to, and you have every right to say no, at any point, whoever you're with. If you want to have sex but your boyfriend or girlfriend or friend doesn’t, you must respect their feelings.
First time or not...
You might think from what you hear from friends that all young people are having sex. But the average age for having sex for the first time is 16, and not everyone does it at that age. Some people wait until they’re older.
You might think from what you hear from friends that all young people are having sex. But the average age for having sex for the first time is 16, and not everyone does it at that age. Some people wait until they’re older.
So you’re not the only one saying no. Even if you’ve had sex before, this doesn’t mean you have to do it again. It’s up to you every time.
When you meet someone you like, it might take weeks, months or even years before you’re both ready for sex. Take it slow, and think about your feelings, as well as theirs. Never rush or push each other into it.
Try talking about the relationship. Communicating helps you to know when the time is right, and to know exactly how you both feel, rather than guessing.
Saying no It might sound strange, but try practising saying no:
- "No, I’m not ready."
- "No, I don’t want to."
- "No, it doesn’t feel right."
Or simply:
- "No."
If you don’t want to have sex, anyone who really likes you will respect your decision even if you’ve had sex with them before.
If your boyfriend or girlfriend says something like, "If you loved me you’d do it", don’t fall for it. It’s emotional blackmail. However much you love or like them, you don't have to have sex with them to prove it.
How to resist pressure
People who want to have sex might say things to try to get you into bed. Here are some ideas of what you can say in return:
People who want to have sex might say things to try to get you into bed. Here are some ideas of what you can say in return:
They say: "Don’t you fancy me?"
You say: "Yes, but I respect you too," or "You’re gorgeous but I want to know you better."
You say: "Yes, but I respect you too," or "You’re gorgeous but I want to know you better."
They say: "My friends think we should have done it by now."
You say: "They don’t know what’s best for us," or "You should care more about what I think."
You say: "They don’t know what’s best for us," or "You should care more about what I think."
They say: "We don’t need to use a condom."
You say: "I’m not ready to be a parent and I don’t want to risk getting an infection."
You say: "I’m not ready to be a parent and I don’t want to risk getting an infection."
They say: "Let’s just get it over with."
You say: "If we wait until we’re ready it’ll be much better."
You say: "If we wait until we’re ready it’ll be much better."
They say: "If you loved me you’d want to do it."
You say: "It’s because I love you that I want to wait," or "If you loved me you wouldn’t say that."
You say: "It’s because I love you that I want to wait," or "If you loved me you wouldn’t say that."
They say: "If we don’t do it soon, I’ll explode!"
You say: "You need biology lessons...It’s not bad for you to wait."
You say: "You need biology lessons...It’s not bad for you to wait."
They say: "But you’re 16."
You say: "Just because it’s legal doesn’t mean I have to. I’ll decide when I’m ready."
You say: "Just because it’s legal doesn’t mean I have to. I’ll decide when I’m ready."
If you both agree to have sex, make sure that:
- you use condoms to protect yourselves from STIs, and
- you use contraception to help prevent an unintended pregnancy.
Sexual assault
A sexual assault can range from inappropriate touching to a life-threatening attack, rape or any other penetration of the mouth, vagina or anus. It's a myth that victims of sexual assault always look battered and bruised. A sexual assault may not leave any outward signs, but it's still a crime.
A sexual assault can range from inappropriate touching to a life-threatening attack, rape or any other penetration of the mouth, vagina or anus. It's a myth that victims of sexual assault always look battered and bruised. A sexual assault may not leave any outward signs, but it's still a crime.
Victims are most likely to be young women aged 16 to 24. But men and women of any age, race, ability or sexuality can be assaulted. This could be by a stranger or, much more likely, someone you know. It could be a partner, former partner, husband, relative, friend or colleague. Don’t be afraid to get help.
Domestic violenceDomestic violence is when one person in a relationship is abusive towards another. This could be emotional, physical or sexual abuse, including forcing you into sexual activity against your will.
If this has happened to you, help is available.
ONLINE RELATIONSHIPS
Love is a natural thing, people fall in love naturally., forcing people to fall inlove is so crazy and people should avoid this.. today i just want to talk about online realtionships. at my own point of view online relationship is not right and its just a waste of time but on the other point of view, people tend to fall inlove and build a happy and stable relationship due to online relationship
Having relationships with people online can be fun but it can also be dangerous. Get clued-up on online relationships here, including tips on keeping yourself safe...
It started with a nudge...
People are hooking up all over the internet. It can be just for fun, or it can get serious. Love, lust, jealousy: an online relationship involves all the emotions of an offline one. But there are some big differences.
True lies
Some people find it easier to type their true thoughts than admit to them face-to-face. So in some ways you get more honesty online. You might learn about someone much faster in a chat window than on a date.
On the other hand, the internet is the perfect place to tell lies: some small, some whoppers. It's easy to create a whole new identity. And you can never be 100% sure that the person you're talking to is who they say they are.
If you get involved with someone online, you need proof of who they really are before you even consider taking the relationship further.Remember that photos are no guarantee. There's nothing to stop some old hobo sending you a pic of a swimwear model (or vice versa.)
On the other hand, the internet is the perfect place to tell lies: some small, some whoppers. It's easy to create a whole new identity. And you can never be 100% sure that the person you're talking to is who they say they are.
If you get involved with someone online, you need proof of who they really are before you even consider taking the relationship further.Remember that photos are no guarantee. There's nothing to stop some old hobo sending you a pic of a swimwear model (or vice versa.)
Keeping it real
Apply the same rules to online relationships that you would to encounters in the real world. It's great to flirt, but set clear boundaries.
If people get obsessive, abusive or have mood swings, back off.
And remember, it might take time before you can fully trust someone.
If people get obsessive, abusive or have mood swings, back off.
And remember, it might take time before you can fully trust someone.
Stepping it up
Webcams and phone chats can get quite full on. It's normal to feel nervous about having intimate conversations online. You should only go as far as you want and never feel pressured into anything you're not comfortable with.
The final option is meeting up. It could work, but make sure you know the dangers.
Alternatively, you might never want your relationship to leave the chat room, that's fine too.
The final option is meeting up. It could work, but make sure you know the dangers.
Alternatively, you might never want your relationship to leave the chat room, that's fine too.
Top Tips!
Don't give your real name on gaming sites.
Best not to have anyone on your IM (instant messaging) list that you don't know in the real world.
You can block people in IM and chat areas.
Tell an adult you trust if an online friend asks to meet you.
Best not to have anyone on your IM (instant messaging) list that you don't know in the real world.
You can block people in IM and chat areas.
Tell an adult you trust if an online friend asks to meet you.
Why Do Men and Women Cheat?
MY OWN OPINION ON WHY DO MEN AND WOMEN CHEAT ON A RELATIONSHIP
Infidelity or extramarital affairs have been extensively studied over the past two decades.
Basically, when it comes to infidelity, two related explanations have been given.
1. RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMSBasically, when it comes to infidelity, two related explanations have been given.
The first explanation is probably the most well known: Spouses cheat because of problems in their relationship - something is missing, passion has faded, partners feel lonely, people find someone who treats them better or who appreciates them more than their current spouse, and so on.
Simply stated, people claim that they are not happy in their relationship so they look for love and affection elsewhere.
2. NATURE
The second explanation explores what it means to be human and asks, "why is being faithful to a spouse so difficult for many people to do?"
Probably the best way to think about these two explanations is to view them as two sides of the same coin.
One explanation looks at what people "say" about infidelity, while the other explanation looks at "how and why infidelity" occurs.
Together, both explanations give us a more complete picture about infidelity, love and romance.
HOW TO BECOME A GENTLEMAN.......
Most ladies get fooled from the outer expression of man; a a real is considered as a gentleman, when I say i real man( gentleman) is not a person that He puts on a good show on his surface. He pretends to be a Gentleman, and likely believes he is. He has mastered the outward signs of a typical real Gentleman. He dresses in style, well, and appropriately. He has learned etiquette quite well. He follows the protocols of social interchange between people of quality. He says the right things at the right times. He will even do good things for people but a gentleman is a person who recognize himself and he is self centered
QUALITY OF A GENTLEMAN
Civilized
Humans are quite different from any other animal.. Our advancement over that time is the result of our brain, and what we have learned. Our development is the result of thinking, understanding, discovering, organizing, planning, and problem solving. As a result, we have created impressive civilizations.
A Gentleman is aware of what civilization is about, and acts accordingly. Civilization is very complex. You cannot learn it overnight. It takes effort. Among other things, it has a set of rules which people have very slowly developed over the centuries. Some are detailed, and may be constantly and slowly changing. They evolve, to fit the times.
The rules of civilization usually work to make relations between people work better and run smoother. They tend to lead towards cooperation and organization, and away from conflicts and fighting with each other. They tend to show respect and support between people.
The rules sometimes become complex. The reasons behind them may not be obvious. If the reasons are not taught to each new generation the rules are not really understood, and can easily be ignored and lost.
One of the things which has allowed us to do so well has been the change from an animal mode of having and raising children, into a civilized mode. Many complex rules tell us how to do this. A Gentleman understand this, and lives by those civilized rules. To explore this in greater depth, read the essay "Stages of the Human Male."
Some rules are very general, and are timeless. They are like universal principles. They apply to all mankind in all ages.
BALANCE OF BENEFIT
A civilize real Gentleman recognizes there should be a balance between the needs of himself, others whom he is associated with (family, friends, associates), and all of mankind. When balance is achieved, the society advances the fastest.
A Gentleman is very willing to do things for other people whom he may not even know, because he recognizes that his little kindness will benefit the other person more than it cost him to do it. A perfect example is holding a door open for the person immediately behind you. This costs the Gentleman very little. It is much easier to hold open the door than to open it. Only a few seconds are lost and usually those don't matter. This little courtesy has resulted in a net saving of energy between you and the other person. The other person will also benefit because he has been honored by you holding the door for him. His feelings are lifted. You feelings are lifted, having done a "good deed."
The same thinking applies when opening the door for a female companion. The male is usually much stronger. The relative cost to him in available energy is small, as compared to that for the female. Thus, he has freed up energy the female may need later. It is an act of kindness and support.
If you do not understand why a rule exists, do not ignore it. Rules often have very practical reasons behind them. Be on the safe side. Follow the rule.
For instance, a butter dish (with butter patties) placed on the table with its own butter fork. The obvious rule here is "use the butter fork to get your butter." But why?
This rule has a sanitary function. You spear the butter with the fork, and transfer it to your plate. Then you use your butter knife to spread the butter on your bread or other food. In this way, as you obtain butter, germs from your plate or butter knife are not likely to get back into the butter dish, because the butter fork has not touched anything which could have come in contact with your germs.
I have given the example of using the butter fork. Underlying it is a universal rule. "Do not do anything which might cause a problem or pain for another person. Make effort to avoid any such harm." This table etiquette rule is designed to do that, through the "proper" use of the table setting utensils.
Be Educated
It means having learned facts and procedures required to be productive and successful in life. You have earned your degree in (whatever) and can do good work in that area.
It means learning how we function inside as humans. Some reasonable understanding about "what makes us tick."
It means learning how to communicate with others quickly, with ease, accurately, and fully. Hence we learn to read and write well. We learn a large vocabulary, so we can communicate more accurately, and be able to quickly understand what others are saying.
It means understanding what society is all about. Learning how to make it operate smoothly and efficiently. Learning the rules. Learning to be a true or real Gentleman.
Be Sensitive
Do you even bother to think how another person is feeling, or might feel because of your actions? You must do so habitually if you are going to be a Gentleman!
Be Well Mannered
Being well mannered is just the end result of applying what it takes to be a real or true Gentleman.
Be Wise
After writing most of this essay, I realized that the definition of wisdom was basically the same as what I wrote above, "A civilize real Gentleman recognizes there should be a balance between the needs of himself, others whom he is associated with (family, friends, associates), and all of mankind. When balance is achieved, the society advances the fastest."
One would have difficulty being a Gentleman, without also being wise, so that he could make good judgment calls.
GUYS MAKE ME PROUD N BE GENTLEMENS AND LADIES WATCH MORE GENTLEMEN COMING........
RELATIONSHIP BEHAVIORS THAT YOU SHOULD PUT UP WITH.........
Arguments and disagreements are part of a strong and healthy part of being together but certain relationship behavior can highlight more serious issues that could even put you in danger. I identify the key warning signs that indicate it’s time to move on.
Aggression
Not all aggressive behaviour should be seen as a danger sign. It’s natural for someone to lose their temper occasionally, but a pattern of violent threats or even physical abuse towards you are the clearest warning you need to extricate yourself from the relationship. According to Kate Taylor, relationship expert at Match.com offers this tip on how to spot this type of behaviour before it’s too late, “Aggression shows a lack of control which might one day be directed towards you, perhaps violently. You often see this early on, directed towards animals, children or people felt to be ‘beneath’ the aggressor. If it’s directed at someone you know, it’s only a matter of time before it’s directed at you.”
Moodiness
A recent survey published by the American Psychological Association found that women were more attracted to moody men than those with a cheerful smile. This is a worrying revelation since excessive moodiness and grumpiness are an indicator that your partner is using selfish emotional mind games to manipulate you. further Kate says, “People who don’t bother to moderate their moods – or even simply warn you about them – are putting their feelings way before yours. They feel self-centred, as if they deserve love no matter how they behave and you shouldn’t put up with it.”
Lack of respect
One of the most basic of expectations from any relationship is mutual respect for each other. While you may not share the same tastes or have the same opinion, your other half should always be respectful of you. Kate says, “If someone is disrespectful of your possessions, your time or your feelings, they are displaying their own feelings of superiority. Don’t tolerate it. Instead, call them on this behaviour calmly and quietly. If they persist, finish with them. You can spot this on the first few dates – if a new partner is rude or abrasive with waiting staff in a restaurant, for example, realise that one day they will behave exactly like that towards you.”
Dishonesty
Both men and women tell the occasional white lie - be it to protect the other person or save hurting their feelings - but if your partner seems to be caught in the perpetual pattern of deception, it’s time to flag up the issue. “Dishonesty destroys trust, which is the backbone of every healthy relationship. Even the smallest lies are destructive, creating doubt and anxiety.” explains Kate, “If you catch your partner out in a lie, immediately point it out to them and ask them why they felt they couldn’t tell the truth. If their answer fails to reassure you, leave.”
Control issues
If you feel as though your partner tries to have too much sway over how you spend your time, whom you see and what you do, there could be some control issues at play. According to Kate this is usually a sign of insecurity, “A controlling person fears rejection so hugely, they will manipulate situations to get the outcome they want. This is behaviour usually learned in childhood, if parents were angry or inconsistent. Be aware though, not all such behaviour is ‘controlling’, some is simply caring. A partner asking you to call them when you arrive somewhere, for example, is just expressing concern, but a partner stopping you calling anyone when you’re together is being controlling.”
Aggression
Not all aggressive behaviour should be seen as a danger sign. It’s natural for someone to lose their temper occasionally, but a pattern of violent threats or even physical abuse towards you are the clearest warning you need to extricate yourself from the relationship. According to Kate Taylor, relationship expert at Match.com offers this tip on how to spot this type of behaviour before it’s too late, “Aggression shows a lack of control which might one day be directed towards you, perhaps violently. You often see this early on, directed towards animals, children or people felt to be ‘beneath’ the aggressor. If it’s directed at someone you know, it’s only a matter of time before it’s directed at you.”
Moodiness
A recent survey published by the American Psychological Association found that women were more attracted to moody men than those with a cheerful smile. This is a worrying revelation since excessive moodiness and grumpiness are an indicator that your partner is using selfish emotional mind games to manipulate you. further Kate says, “People who don’t bother to moderate their moods – or even simply warn you about them – are putting their feelings way before yours. They feel self-centred, as if they deserve love no matter how they behave and you shouldn’t put up with it.”
Lack of respect
One of the most basic of expectations from any relationship is mutual respect for each other. While you may not share the same tastes or have the same opinion, your other half should always be respectful of you. Kate says, “If someone is disrespectful of your possessions, your time or your feelings, they are displaying their own feelings of superiority. Don’t tolerate it. Instead, call them on this behaviour calmly and quietly. If they persist, finish with them. You can spot this on the first few dates – if a new partner is rude or abrasive with waiting staff in a restaurant, for example, realise that one day they will behave exactly like that towards you.”
Dishonesty
Both men and women tell the occasional white lie - be it to protect the other person or save hurting their feelings - but if your partner seems to be caught in the perpetual pattern of deception, it’s time to flag up the issue. “Dishonesty destroys trust, which is the backbone of every healthy relationship. Even the smallest lies are destructive, creating doubt and anxiety.” explains Kate, “If you catch your partner out in a lie, immediately point it out to them and ask them why they felt they couldn’t tell the truth. If their answer fails to reassure you, leave.”
Control issues
If you feel as though your partner tries to have too much sway over how you spend your time, whom you see and what you do, there could be some control issues at play. According to Kate this is usually a sign of insecurity, “A controlling person fears rejection so hugely, they will manipulate situations to get the outcome they want. This is behaviour usually learned in childhood, if parents were angry or inconsistent. Be aware though, not all such behaviour is ‘controlling’, some is simply caring. A partner asking you to call them when you arrive somewhere, for example, is just expressing concern, but a partner stopping you calling anyone when you’re together is being controlling.”
The Magical Ingredients of Love Relationships
Love is such a powerful human emotion that experts are constantly studying it. They've discovered that love has three main qualities:
Attraction is the "chemistry" part of love. It's all about the physical — even sexual — interest that two people have in each other. Attraction is responsible for the desire we feel to kiss and hold the object of our affection. Attraction is also what's behind the flushed, nervous-but-excited way we feel when that person is near. Closeness is the bond that develops when we share thoughts and feelings that we don't share with anyone else. When you have this feeling of closeness with your boyfriend or girlfriend, you feel supported, cared for, understood, and accepted for who you are. Trust is a big part of this. Commitment is the promise or decision to stick by the other person through the ups and downs of the relationship.
These three qualities of love can be combined in different ways to make different kinds of relationships. For example, closeness without attraction is the kind of love we feel for best friends. We share secrets and personal stuff with them, we support them, and they stand by us. But we are not romantically interested in them. 
For people falling in love for the first time, it can be hard to tell the difference between the intense, new feelings of physical attraction and the deeper closeness that goes with being in love.
Dating and marriage is different than it was twenty years ago. Today, more than 50% of all marriages fail for one reason or another. Just thinking about that makes "commitment" seem scary. It seems that when relationships are faced with challenges, people quit trying. Dating is more like a marathon, trying to date as many people as possible, instead of taking time to get to know someone at a deeper level. For married couples, divorce is not biased. Whether married for thirty years or eight months, the outcome can be the same.
The fact is that relationships, whether dating or married, are hard. Things do not always go perfectly, fighting does occur, and it takes a 100% commitment from both parties to make it a success. Often when people break off a relationship, they feel as though something is missing. The "spark" has gone, leaving one or both people feeling inadequate and unfulfilled.
There are hundreds of things you can do to better your relationship. To help get you headed in the right direction, we have chosen 5 ways to build, strengthen, and enhance your relationship.
1. Start Over
When couples first get together, everything is new and exciting. They overlook the little annoying things the other person does. However, after time, the nagging starts, instead of hearing, "You look beautiful," they might hear "Why are you wearing that shirt?" If this sounds like your relationship, first, the two of you need to sit down and be honest that things have changed. Identify the things each of you did in the beginning of the relationship that created the attraction in the first place.
Then together, make a commitment to start over. The truth is, both of you will have to work on this. It will not automatically be easy but it is possible. Start by forgiving each other, forgetting the past, and then start over with the flirtation. Focus only on the special things your mate does and relearn to put the unimportant things aside. It will take some time so be patient
2. Schedule Time
Spending quality time together is crucial. This time can be with friends, dining out, attending a sporting event, or cuddling together while watching a favorite movie. The activity is not what is important but the fact that you are together, doing something that you both enjoy. People have extremely busy schedules and between work, family, the home, errands, and everything else going on, finding time for your mate can be difficult. Just as you would schedule a meeting on your calendar, show some courtesy in the relationship by scheduling time with each other. Once the plan is in place, no backing out unless you have some life and death emergency.
3. The Power of Touch
When was the last time you walked up to your mate for no reason and without saying a word, affectionately placed a kiss on their neck? This is not in a sexual way, but an affectionate way. There is a difference. The next time the two of you are sitting in the car, at the grocery story, or standing in line at the theater, quietly reach over and take their hand. Do not be surprised if you get a strange look of curiosity the first time!
4. Surprise
If you and your mate have scheduled some time for a Friday night dinner, put together a surprise instead. For example, if your mate loves professional wrestling, buy some tickets near the front or if they like concerts, purchase the tickets ahead of time, getting the best seats possible. When Friday night comes around, insist on driving and head toward the location where the event is taking place. When asked where you are going, simply answer, "I have a surprise for you. I know you love professional wrestling so I purchased two great seats for tonight's performance," or "I know we had planned on going to dinner, but I wanted to surprise you with something special. I purchased tickets to see one of your favorite groups in concert." The idea of you getting the tickets for something THEY like and then keeping it as a special surprise will touch the heart!
5. Needed Space
TEN THINGS MEN LIKE IN A WOMAN......
• She is on her own. Ladies, this means that you should be independent so you shouldn’t need anyone else to take care of you.
• She never makes the first move in a relationship. Although it is a problem which has risen a lot of contradictions it seems that men prefer that kind of women who don’t make the first move.
• She is sexy without being vulgar. In other words, you should use a non-sexual language in case of a flirt.
• She waits before having sex. You should wait at least two weeks before having sex because if you give him too much from the beginning he might lose the interest to know other sites of you.
• Do simple things in order to show him you care.
• She must make him look well. You should laugh at his jokes and boast him any time you have an occasion.
• Do not pressure him in doing something he doesn’t want no matter if we are talking about a trip in the mountains or a marriage proposal.
• Don’t make compromises more than necessary. Men prefer women who have as a motto “Respect and you’ll be respected”.
• She is a very well-mannered woman. Men will always appreciate women who know how to behave elegantly in any situation.
• She knows what an important role has love in a relationship. Although it may seem false, men are very romantic so feelings and their statement play an important role in a relationship.
LOVE TIPS..
Even the most cynical and ‘grown-up’ among us love a fairytale. Whether it’s Disney’s Tangled or Cinderella and her glass slipper, who hasn’t at some time dreamt of being whisked away on a white horse to a life of never-ending romance with an impossibly handsome prince or princess?
Dr Gian Gonzaga, world leading relationship scientist and Senior Research Director for eHarmony.co.uk believes a little imagination is healthy but finding the right partner also needs a dose of reality.
He says: “Anyone who believes that finding or keeping a great relationship is a matter of luck or chance may be disappointed. Relationships can absolutely be filled with fairytale romance, but amazingly, a lot of people expect their Prince Charming to magically appear on their doorstep and rescue them. The reality is that taking a positive and active approach to finding love is the best way to find your own happy ending.”
Dr Gonzaga, author of new book ‘Dating the second time around, Finding love that lasts’, says people can fall into the trap of waiting for a new relationship to find them or believe that finding a compatible partner is outside of their control or ability. In his book, Dr Gonzaga touches on some great tips that those of us who are looking for a fairytale romance should bear in mind.
To find a relationship and make it work, you need to take control over the process by searching for the right type of partner, and acting to ensure the quality of this relationship.
Lots of people expect Prince Charming to appear from nowhere, and they think that whether it works out or not will be down to fate or the cosmos or astrological compatibility rather than anything they might do or not do. Those who believe they can control whether a relationship works or not will ultimately be happier.
Psychologists call this “locus of control.” Some people have an external locus of control, which means they don’t think they have the power to change things.Others have an internal locus of control, which means that they believe they can change their situation with some effort.
Those who have an internal locus of control more often try to make things better rather than passively accepting their fate, and that alone makes a big difference
We’ve all grown up on Hollywood’s romantic movies with speedy
As the old saying goes, only fools rush in. Too much too soon can scare a very suitable partner or cause problems in the longer term. Allow time for authentic feelings to develop before you say ‘I love you’, and consider that everyone has his or her own emotional clock.
When you’re in a relationship with your own Prince Charming it’s important to keep the fires burning, even years down the line when romance can sometimes take a backseat. But how do you keep that exciting ‘butterflies’ feeling? The simple answer is by making time for your partner and making them feel special.
The Obama's famously have their ‘date night’ but how about setting up a monthly ‘romantic surprise’ - put aside say £50 to take each other out for a romantic dinner or to a concert. And don’t forget to praise your partner’s achievements and compliment them as often as you can, in a genuine way. Why not write a love letter or cook their favourite meal as a surprise? It's the small gestures which often make the most impact.
The couples that look out for each other stay happy together. You can have your ‘happy ever after’ but like Cinderella you’ll have to put some work in.
follow this and i guarantee your love life will be good.
THAI BREAK RECORD FOR LONGEST KISS.
JUSTIN BIEBER AND SELENA GOMEZ TAKING IT TO THE NEXT LEVEL...
• She never makes the first move in a relationship. Although it is a problem which has risen a lot of contradictions it seems that men prefer that kind of women who don’t make the first move.
• She is sexy without being vulgar. In other words, you should use a non-sexual language in case of a flirt.
• She waits before having sex. You should wait at least two weeks before having sex because if you give him too much from the beginning he might lose the interest to know other sites of you.
• Do simple things in order to show him you care.
• She must make him look well. You should laugh at his jokes and boast him any time you have an occasion.
• Do not pressure him in doing something he doesn’t want no matter if we are talking about a trip in the mountains or a marriage proposal.
• Don’t make compromises more than necessary. Men prefer women who have as a motto “Respect and you’ll be respected”.
• She is a very well-mannered woman. Men will always appreciate women who know how to behave elegantly in any situation.
• She knows what an important role has love in a relationship. Although it may seem false, men are very romantic so feelings and their statement play an important role in a relationship.
LOVE TIPS..
Fairytale romance - does it exist?
Dr Gian Gonzaga, world leading relationship scientist and Senior Research Director for eHarmony.co.uk believes a little imagination is healthy but finding the right partner also needs a dose of reality.
He says: “Anyone who believes that finding or keeping a great relationship is a matter of luck or chance may be disappointed. Relationships can absolutely be filled with fairytale romance, but amazingly, a lot of people expect their Prince Charming to magically appear on their doorstep and rescue them. The reality is that taking a positive and active approach to finding love is the best way to find your own happy ending.”
Dr Gonzaga, author of new book ‘Dating the second time around, Finding love that lasts’, says people can fall into the trap of waiting for a new relationship to find them or believe that finding a compatible partner is outside of their control or ability. In his book, Dr Gonzaga touches on some great tips that those of us who are looking for a fairytale romance should bear in mind.
Control your own destiny
Lots of people expect Prince Charming to appear from nowhere, and they think that whether it works out or not will be down to fate or the cosmos or astrological compatibility rather than anything they might do or not do. Those who believe they can control whether a relationship works or not will ultimately be happier.
Psychologists call this “locus of control.” Some people have an external locus of control, which means they don’t think they have the power to change things.Others have an internal locus of control, which means that they believe they can change their situation with some effort.
Those who have an internal locus of control more often try to make things better rather than passively accepting their fate, and that alone makes a big difference
We’ve all grown up on Hollywood’s romantic movies with speedy
Don't hurry love.
courtships and happy endings and it’s easy to think that real-life romance should happen quickly and easily.
As the old saying goes, only fools rush in. Too much too soon can scare a very suitable partner or cause problems in the longer term. Allow time for authentic feelings to develop before you say ‘I love you’, and consider that everyone has his or her own emotional clock.
Be more romantic
The Obama's famously have their ‘date night’ but how about setting up a monthly ‘romantic surprise’ - put aside say £50 to take each other out for a romantic dinner or to a concert. And don’t forget to praise your partner’s achievements and compliment them as often as you can, in a genuine way. Why not write a love letter or cook their favourite meal as a surprise? It's the small gestures which often make the most impact.
The couples that look out for each other stay happy together. You can have your ‘happy ever after’ but like Cinderella you’ll have to put some work in.
follow this and i guarantee your love life will be good.
THAI BREAK RECORD FOR LONGEST KISS.
Thailand is making world headlines today for breaking the Guinness World Record for longest continuous kiss during a Valentine's Day competition that started in Pattaya on February 12.
The winning couple, Akekachai Tiranarat, 42, and wife Raksana Taranarat, 31, locked lips for a mind-numbing 46 hours, 24 minutes and 9 seconds. That was enough to beat out 13 other couples for the title.
Impressive, yet kind of gross at the same time.
Interestingly, Thailand isn’t even a nation of kissers. Rarely do you see smooching on Thai TV, kissing being deemed too risqué for the nation’s impressionable youngsters. Even at weddings, a kiss on the cheek evokes oohs and ahhs from delightfully shocked guests.
In fact, many Thais would rather sniff faces than kiss them. “Hom gam” –- which basically means “sniff cheek” -- is considered the equivalent of the kiss, given by doting boyfriends to girlfriends, grandmothers to grandsons and so on.
On the other hand, maybe it’s not so strange given the record did get broken in Pattaya, a place known worldwide for its amorous hook-ups. To put it nicely.
In any event, the happy kissers didn’t just do it for the title, which still needs to be verified by Guinness officials. They won 100,000 baht in cash and a diamond ring worth 50,000 baht from event organizers.
Read more: Thai couple breaks record for longest kiss | CNNGo.com http://www.cnngo.com/bangkok/life/thailand-breaks-record-worlds-longest-continuous-kiss-204105#ixzz1OGgXbPAo
Read more: Thai couple breaks record for longest kiss | CNNGo.com http://www.cnngo.com/bangkok/life/thailand-breaks-record-worlds-longest-continuous-kiss-204105#ixzz1OGgXbPAo
JUSTIN BIEBER AND SELENA GOMEZ TAKING IT TO THE NEXT LEVEL...
Things just keep getting sweeter and sweeter for Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez…literally. This afternoon (June 3), the 17-year-old rockstar, his 18-year-old girlfriend and his grandfather visited Justin’s favorite candy store — Rheo Thompson Candies in Stratford, Ontario — and HollywoodLife.com has all the inside scoop!
“Justin, Selena and Justin’s grandfather, Bruce, came in at about 12:30 p.m. for a private tour of Rheo Thompson Candies,” the store owner, Kristene Steed, tells us in an exclusive interview.
“Justin and Selena were just adorable, the sweetest, cutest couple. We took them to the production area and kitchen, where we make our homemade candies. They thought it was really neat. Selena is obviously a chocolate fan because her whole face lit up when we showed her how the chocolate was delivered in 2000 lb. cases. They tried all sorts of candies including the Vanilla Caramel and the Butter Cream Center. But Justin’s all time favorite is our Mint Smoothies. He said to Selena, ‘You have to try this’, and after she tasted it she said, ‘This is a seriously good chocolate!’”
She adds, “It was really a thrill to have them here. Justin has been a fan of our Chocolate Smoothies since he was a little boy. Justin’s grandfather said, ‘I have been enjoying these chocolates for over 40 years.’ ”
